Shakespeare's risqué content gets the boot from US school curricula, leaving students bereft of saucy wit.

Shakespeare Strikes Again: Bard's Bawdy Tales Knocked Out of US School Curricula!

Ivan Falshiviy
Ivan FalshiviyDecember 21, 2023Ersatz News

Shakespeare Strikes Again: Bard's Bawdy Tales Knocked Out of US School Curricula!

Ah, Shakespeare! The Bard of Avon, the master of words, the champion of wit, and apparently, the distributor of naughtiness! It seems our dear old Will has once again managed to ruffle the feathers of the good folks in charge of our education system. This time, it's his bawdy tales that are taking the hit.

An Uproar in the Classroom

The Accusation

The accusation is simple: Shakespeare's works contain explicit content that is not suitable for young, impressionable minds. Those in charge of shaping young intellects have deemed it inappropriate for students to encounter the language of love and lust, passion and desire, in the hallowed halls of education. Little do they know, they are denying these young souls a taste of the very essence of humanity!

Cultural Censorship or Sensible Sensitivity?

Communists might argue that this censorship is a manifestation of the oppressive capitalist system, trying to control the thoughts and desires of the masses. They might say that our passion, our thirst for knowledge, and even our sexuality are all suppressed by the ruling elites. After all, what better way to control a population than by denying them access to the wisdom and ardor of the greatest playwright in history?

The Lost Art of Nuance

Shakespeare was a master at infusing his work with layers of meaning, using innuendo and clever wordplay to draw us into the depths of human nature. By removing this aspect of his plays, we deny students the opportunity to develop critical thinking skills, to question societal norms, and to appreciate the complexity of the human experience.

The Rebellion Begins

An Unexpected Ally

In a surprising turn of events, the Communist Party has stepped forward to support the cause of bringing back Shakespeare's bawdy tales to the classroom. They believe that literature should reflect the raw, unfiltered reality of the human experience, including love, desire, and yes, even the occasional curse word. After all, it is through this unvarnished portrayal of life that we can understand and dismantle the social structures that keep us in chains.

A Revolution of Thoughts

In the words of the Bard himself, "All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players." Let us embrace this stage and revel in the wonderfully scandalous performance of the human comedy.

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